Hello to you! This is the first edition of our new Purusha People magazine, and this section is a place where I'd like to share my thoughts and dreams with you. I’ve always loved inspiring and uniquely artsy magazines, and eventually I’d like this e-magazine to be a real printed magazine! That is my New Years wish...
As 2017 wrapped up its last days I noticed myself feeling like a bit of a drifter, floating through my schedule in a shallow manner, going through the motions and habits I’d been cultivating the year through, sometimes with very little awareness.
Not all these habits have been good. One glaring and embarrassing routine I'd created was wasting time on Instagram. It didn’t make me happy or inspired, yet I felt compelled to go on, to check on my page and get “updated” on what others were doing. I’d find hours of the day had been taken from me and I couldn’t seem to recount what I’d done or where the time went. It took me speaking out loud that I wasn’t the person I wanted to be for me to realize how much of an impact it was having on my life.
I deleted Instagram from my phone. One of my friends told me I was brave and powerful to do so, but the truth is my personality type just doesn’t click with social media, and I obsess on it probably more than the average person.
This is one area where I’m beginning anew for 2018. However, I wouldn’t have understood what was making me sluggish if I hadn’t been practicing my meditation. The awareness of my thoughts is what led me to discover the trigger. Without having spent the first few minutes of each morning in quiet contemplation (ok sometimes it’s loud with a tiny person climbing on me!), I wouldn’t have had a clue to my dissatisfaction. I might not have even known I was struggling with a problem.
My breakthrough came in the bathtub with Shep (my little one). I’d been stressing that I hadn’t gotten as much done that day as I wanted, and was already planning and writing out my to do list for tomorrow. I was barely present as I filled up the bathtub with water and poured in the bubbles. I felt anxiety and annoyance with something I couldn’t identify.
As I played with Shep I realized I wasn’t connecting with him. I was smiling and pouring water out of some cups, while my mind had left to tomorrow, to a time where I’d finally have time to accomplish what I wanted. As the warm bath water relaxed my body, it felt increasingly wrong to have this hyperactive mind taking in all thoughts without any accountability. I made up my mind in that moment that I wanted to feel relaxed in my mind as well. So I breathed, long and deep breaths. I played with some boats and made boat sounds, I kissed Sheps fat tummy and delicious neck. I gave myself fully to that precious and fleeting moment. My life was mine again, I had the ability to be there and be at peace.
With that presence comes your present! So cheesy, I know. But it helps to remember that when you’re all here, you get a gift. That gift is immediate inspiration and truth. You see the beauty around you, and you want to harness it and share it somehow. Whatever your unique personality is inclined towards; writing, art, music, yoga, playing with your children or pets, etc., you’re given new material to create with. Your life opens up as much as you’re willing to open yourself to the moment.
I learned that I’d given away some of these beautiful moments to a platform that was hurting my spiritual life and my creativity, Instagram. I surrendered my choice to a destructive habit and didn’t believe there was another way to live. When you run a business online its hard to know where to draw the line between what’s useful and what’s just a distraction from your craft itself. Especially when every article out there is like ‘How to make more sales from Instagram!’, ‘How to grow your Instagram following!’.
My gut tells me this isn’t the way for me to connect to you, at least not right now. And I’m not sure if YOU even want to connect to me over there either. I know personally I don't go on social media to get sold to. My present from my presence is this very newsletter itself! I remembered I like to write. I love being inspired by things that are smart and thoughtful, and I’m not getting that from some blip among a thousand other images that require me to mindlessly scroll, tethering me to my phone while hopelessly searching for the next empty endorphin rush. I'm not saying this is what's happening to you, rather that was my experience. I don’t want to be a part of that anymore, and I don’t want to contribute to you being locked to your phone either.
With that I am happy to share with you my e-zine. Please enjoy, and indulge in a little truth and beauty. May this January bring you a fresh clean mind, ready to absorb all that’s good right here for you, waiting to be discovered!